Tuesday, December 31, 2013

They're only innocent until proven guilty.

Dec - MAMA! 
Me -  Yes?
Dec - My claws are sharp. They need to be cut, I don't want to scratch any innocent animals.

Friday, December 13, 2013

Don't forget to clear your browser history.

This quote is from Christian, Dec's older brother.  He was talking to me and just blurted out this gem in the middle of the conversation.  -

I have a lot of questions I need answered.  But not from you, I'm saving them for Google.

Thursday, December 5, 2013

Monday, November 18, 2013

Wait, what? What just happened?

"Look the King Orange wants you to have his honor peels!  And his crown!"

Then he grunts and pulls out the white stem thing in the middle and adds it to the pile.  Then he walks away.  My own child just trolled me in real life into throwing away his orange peel for him.

“To live is to war with trolls.” 
― Henrik Ibsen

Wednesday, November 6, 2013

My kids have a lottery plan, do you?

Dec-  Momma, what would you do if you win $100 million dollars?
Me-   Oh, gee.  I don't know, what would you do?
Dec-  I would buy a mansion.  Some candy.  A couch and a TV.  And netflix plus a CD(DVD) player.
Christian (the older brother)- But you can't just rush into buying things like a CD player and xbox.  You have to make sure you can pay your bills first.
Dec-  But I'd buy a bed too.

Thursday, October 31, 2013

Cogito ergo sum.

Decaln (to older brother) You're a sassy pants!
Christian (the older brother)  Nu-uh!  You are!
Declan (in a very serious voice) Wait, how did you know?

Friday, October 25, 2013

Saturday, October 19, 2013

If it's not too much to ask for...

I would eat it if it was healthy and tasted like cheetos.

-Declan on what he wishes for in a salad dressing.

Thursday, October 10, 2013

The fruit of knowledge.

We went to an apple orchard today and this is what Declan told one of the apples as he was picking it:  Not so fun now, apple.  Not so fun when we eat you.

Wednesday, October 9, 2013

Monday, September 23, 2013

Dream big.

While watching Jem and the Holograms:

Unicorns have wings?
Dream on, girl.



(They've watched all the "good" shows on Netflix and are now trying out all my childhood cartoons from the 80's.)

Thursday, September 19, 2013

Duh.

At lunchtime there was a rainstorm, instead of eating his lunch Declan went out to play in the rain.  So around 2 pm he comes inside and eats his lunch while watching the GI Joe show from when I was a kid.  After he finished his stir-fry and rice we have this conversation:

Dec - Where is my grilled cheese?
Me  - I didn't make you one.
Silence for about 20 seconds and then he sighs loudly.
Me  - Would you like one?
Dec - OF COURSE!  What did you expect?

Monday, July 1, 2013

Get used to life disappointing you.

You ruined my cereal experience.


(We ran out of milk and I forgot to buy more.)

Sunday, May 5, 2013

Is that in cubic feet?

Declan - Hey Christian, you left your foot dirt in the tub.
Christian - How much?
Declan - A whole foot's full.

Thursday, April 25, 2013

Get in my belly!

After eating his waffle Dec said,
"That warm waffle is no longer on this earth."

Monday, April 22, 2013

The Giving Tree.

While Declan was eating an apple, "Mmmmmm I don't know what the workers put in this, but I like it."

Tuesday, April 16, 2013

He has become self-aware. My job is done.

Dec comes running up to me, "I'm bleeding!  I've got a cut on my finger."

Me, "What did you get a cut from?"

Dec, "For learning something I can't do."


I spent the next few minutes trying to get the story out of him and bandaging him up, but all he would say is, "I learned a valuable lesson from the scissors today."

Friday, April 12, 2013

Happy birthday Dec!

Way to make it to 7!  You are a joy and I'm so happy to be a part of your life!

Thursday, March 28, 2013

Positive reinforcement for adaptive behavior.

We went through the bank drive-thru and the teller gave the kids stickers.

Declan has plans for those stickers.  "I'm saving these stickers in case of a Zombie Apocalypse   I'll use these stickers to train the zombies."

Thursday, March 14, 2013

How fast does your boat go?

Declan: What's the boat that's faster than an octopus and a shark?

Me: Ummmmm a jet?

Declan: That's it.

Sunday, March 10, 2013

Health nut.

I ate an all sugar cake.  I need one of your smoothies(kale, spinach and blueberries) to zero out the sugar.

Saturday, February 23, 2013

Sunday, February 10, 2013

Saturday, February 2, 2013

Monday, January 28, 2013

Probably cleaner than the local pool.

While looking at the pets in Petco...

Oh look, the cats get a swimming pool of poop.

Thursday, January 24, 2013

Keeping the memories alive.

I'm keeping my eye on the memory of Trisha and Ryan's wedding.

(He's talking about wanting to keep a memory forever.)

Saturday, January 19, 2013

Monday, January 14, 2013

Urban Jungle.

Dec-Why do we have to check on Jet? (Jet is Grandma and Grandpa's dog)
Me- Because Grandma and Grandpa are in Chicago for the day.
Dec- Oh.  Are they spending money there?
Me- I'm sure.
Dec- Are they spending their money to survive?

Monday, January 7, 2013

The View From the Couch.

I want to see the whole entire movie, so don't put your head in front of it.

Wednesday, January 2, 2013